I, donut

I hold Krispy Kreme donuts in high regard. If you haven't had one, then I pity you. The simple, fluffy, glazed donut is the One Donut, the center of the donut world, a shining light that leads all to the way of filling one's innards with sugary happiness and fulfillment. Now, KK has it's detractors for sure, but they are unenlightened. Like the primitive apes they still fling their poop at one another. May God facilitate their evolution from unthinking trolls to humble donut loving men and woman.

Krispy Kreme holds a place on high, much like a template for other donuts to emulate. The other day, I was lucky enough to have a donut, not a KK, but a donut from one of our local farmer's markets here in Los Angeles. This donut obviously was raised in the fiery heat of the oven put forth by KK. It was a bit larger and definitely glazed. I was fully sticky upon finishing my feast of donut. If I could find out from where this donut came, I would recommend you find one immediately. Alas, this is information I cannot share, and so the Donut of the Unknown Farmer's Market will go down in recorded history as a great donut of mystery.

One donut I *can* recommend is this amazing delicacy put forth by one Alex Donut. Alex Donut is located on Franklin Ave. Just north of the 101 freeway behind the Capital Records. Run, don't walk, to Alex Donut as this donut also follows the path of the KK. It is somewhat larger, every bit as fluffy, and every bit as glazed as the KK. But here is where it is unique: the progenitors of this wonderful Alex Donut have ordained chocolate be laid upon the top of the donut, and then covered in the ubiquitous glaze. Delicious.

I bring you this information as it is my duty. I am Dutch, mostly, and it falls to me, like all Dutch to spread the Word of the Donut. For it was the Dutch, in the late 1800's, who, made sick by the undercooked center of their round cakes, pushed this glob of wet and cold dough out with their fingers. And so was the donut born. A ring of dough, cooked and eaten, for pleasure.

I suggest you have a donut. For life is short and donuts are plentiful.

Also some people will dispute the origins of the donut as being created by a pirate or some girls in the old west or some such nonsense, but they can just shut up.